When "Sorry" Isn't Enough!

To say "I'm sorry" has different meanings depending on context and culture. A core issue is how culpability is assessed. An apology might be seen as an admission of wrongdoing, or it could be seen as an expression of eagerness to repair a damaged relationship without implying culpability. What do you mean when you say "I'm sorry"?

You might mean, "I'm the one responsible, and I accept blame". Or you could mean, "it's unfortunate that this has happened". In a survey of US and Japanese undergraduates, the Japanese students recalled issuing an average of 11.05 apologies the previous week, whereas the US students recalled just 4.51.

Addicted to Drama!

"Don't you know who I am?!" Such an over-blown expression of entitlement seems obvious. But we can all be addicted to drama in more subtle ways. For example, do you find your partner is "hard work"? You probably perpetuate the situation by holding a belief that "I'm entitled to be treated better than this". Do you get caught up with your finances, never having enough money? You may have learned at an early age that "money doesn't come easily". If it does, you probably don't trust it. And what about life in general? If you remember drama in your family, you may have developed the same patterns of behaviour to get your own needs met. And you probably still do (if there's no drama in your life how can you be sure that anyone will pay attention to you?)!